


Rebel Without A Clue

by AlissaShawWrites



Series: Tony's a great dad to his Spider Son [3]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Domestic Avengers, Drunken Shenanigans, Gen, Parent Tony Stark, Precious Peter Parker, Tony Stark Has A Heart
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-26
Updated: 2018-02-26
Packaged: 2019-03-24 05:58:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13804896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlissaShawWrites/pseuds/AlissaShawWrites
Summary: Tony and the Avengers go out of town for a weekend and Peter is allowed to have Ned stay over at the tower for the first time. Peter decides to rebel a little and gets drunk. Ned and MJ have to deal with it.(This is part of a miniseries but it is not necessary to read them all to understand what is happening though it is recommended)





	Rebel Without A Clue

Ned was soon going to be spending his first night in Avengers Tower. The Avengers themselves were heading out to some important event that Peter wasn't invited too. Normally he'd be upset that he was left out of an Avengers event, but Tony was kind enough to let Ned sleepover; after a few days of begging of course, and somehow, that seemed more appealing. 

While the Avengers packed their items into a limo, Tony was lecturing both Peter and JARVIS. “I don’t want to come home and have a mortally wounded Spiderman and friend. No going out at all. As far as people are concerned, Spiderman is with us. No other friends over. No leaving the property.” Tony glared at the teen as he rolled his eyes, “I’m so serious, Peter. I will ground you.”

Peter sighed, rolling his eyes again, “alright, dad.”

Deafening silence.

“Sorry,” Peter coughed nervously, “that was rude. I’ll be good.”

Tony smiled, ruffling the boy's hair. "I know, kid. You're a goodie-two-shoes. I'm just worrying over nothing."

“I am not! Ned and I get crazy when we’re together! Who knows what we’ll get up to while he’s here.”

Tony laughed, “I overheard you two talking on the phone. You’re planning on building a LEGO Hogwarts playset.” It was Tony’s turn to roll his eyes, “so crazy.” The Avengers were now piling into the car, waiting only for Tony. He climbed in with them, rolling the window down so he could still talk to Peter. “OK,” he began again, “I left money on the kitchen table for pizza and since I know it’ll happen regardless of what I tell you; you may use the lab.”

Peters smile was indescribable. Tony had never seen anyone with that much excitement painted on their features. It seemed impossible and yet, there stood Peter; the most excitable human being alive. “Thank you! Oh, Ned’s going to love, love, love that! It will get crazy in here tonight!” He could hear the other Avengers laughing behind Tony.

Bruce moved into the frame of the window smiling pleasantly, not that he ever stopped when he wasn’t the Hulk. “You sound just like me at your age.” The group laughed harder and immediately started making jokes. “Wow, rude guys. Don’t listen to them, Peter. It’s fun being the genius of the group. Even if everyone else in the group is jealous.”

“Oh no, you did not just say that,” said Tony.

“Oh, he did,” Natasha responded.

“Can I call for a reality check?” Clint chuckled.

Tony held his thumb and pinky finger to his ear as if it were a phone, "yeah? Hello? Oh, Bruce, it's for you. Want to take it or are you busy with your best friends, your PHD's?"

“Lame joke, Tony. Cook that one up in your lab?”

“Oh, good lord!” Peter yelled, “just go before you start another civil war. Ned’s gonna be here any minute and you’re still here! If he saw all of you he’d pass out.”

Natasha pushed her way to the window, elbowing the two men out of her way. Slowly she shook her head, smiling all the while. “We’re on our way out, Peter. Go out and have a little fun tonight, all right? Enjoy the time you have to be a teenager.”

A surprised yet happy expression crossed Peters face as he turned to Tony, “is she telling me to be bad?”

Tony turned to her, “since when are you the cool mom type?”

She held her head high with no quiver of her smile, “I always have been. He’s a growing boy who’s never done anything wild and crazy. That isn’t healthy.”

Peter cut in rather abruptly, “I sneak out regularly to be Spiderman. Shouldn’t that count for something?”

Natasha pulled him close by the collar of his shirt. For a moment, Peter thought he was in trouble for interrupting her, however, her voice sang sweetly in a whisper, "it's okay to be a little selfish once and awhile. Don't be afraid to be a teenager, Peter. Tony wouldn't be that upset with you." She let go of him.

“Alright, Nat,” Tony grumbled turning back to face Peter, “I don’t know what she told you, but I recommend not doing it. We’ll be back either tomorrow or Monday depending on how this meeting goes and I want everything intact and you safe.” The limo began pulling away from Peter while Tony was still yelling at him through the open window, “NO SPIDERMAN! BE GOOD! HAVE FUN!” Tony’s head disappeared into the car only to reappear seconds later, “NOT TOO MUCH FUN THOUGH!”

Peter was left in the cloud of upturned dirt, waving goodbye with one hand, and smoothing out the wrinkled collar with the other. He didn’t have much time to think about what they had said before Ned arrived. They hadn’t even stepped in the door and he was already raving about how amazing it was to be there, or how cool it was that Tony let him stay. They bid farewell to his mother before embarking on the grand tour of the tower.

Everything quickly overwhelmed Ned. From the advanced technology jammed into every corner of the building, to the sheer size of building, it was amazing to him. Peter couldn’t help but imagine that this is what he must have looked like when Tony showed him around the first time.

The tour ended at the lab where they would be spending most, if not all the night. It was strange to Peter; Tony’s absence was quick to thought. The hours began to tick by and although he and Ned were having fun, something didn’t feel right. Perhaps it was what the others had said before they left. Specifically, what Natasha had said. “Hey Ned, are we boring?” he asked suddenly, surprising Ned.

“Uh, what?”

Peter fiddled with some of the LEGO pieces, “you know… we’re in High School, currently in an Avengers laboratory and all we’re doing is building a LEGO set and arguing over which pizza to order, even though we’ve ordered the same kind of pizza at every sleepover we’ve ever had in our entire lives. When are we gonna go out and do something crazy?”

“Crazy? You’re Spiderman! You are crazy, man!”

Peter shook his head, “no something spontaneous. Something normal teenagers do. Lets,” he paused, looking around at nothing. His eyes stopped, landing on Ned’s confused face, “I got it! Let’s drink! Tony’s got like, a hundred bars in this place. That’s typical bad teenager stuff, right? Drink some, water it down, then pray no one figures it out. Come on, let’s go!”

Peter was already out the door before Ned could protest. JARVIS decided to take this time to do it for him. The voice echoed through the halls as Peter jogged and Ned followed suit. “Mr Parker, Tony Stark would not be happy to discover an minor stealing and consuming his alcohol, especially while he is absent, and you are unsupervised.”

“Oh, come on J! I’m a teenager. It’s natural to rebel.”

Peter stopped short of the closest liquor cabinet, holding back in amazement. He had never stopped to really look at the contents so closely but now that he had, he couldn't believe his eyes. There were so many bottles, labelled with things he didn't understand like 40% alcohol while others were labelled higher percentages. Weren't they all alcohol? He couldn't understand. That, however; did not matter to him at this moment. He grabbed the highest percentage he could find before JARVIS could lock the cabinet.

Ned caught up to him, looking dazed. "Peter I really, really, really don't think this is a good idea. Mr Stark finally lets me come over and we steal from him?"

“It’s fine. I’m his favourite Avenger.”

“I don’t think that’s entirely true.”

He sighed, “it’s fine. We only get a small window of time to do stuff like this. I don’t want to miss it just because I’m scared.”

Ned nodded, “I get it… fine. Only on one condition.”

“What?”

“You take the blame when we get caught.”

Peter laughed, unscrewing the cap. Raising the bottle in a mock toast, “absolutely.” He lowered the bottle to his lips and took a sip, spitting it out immediately. “Gross! How does Tony drink this stuff?”

“Let me try,” said Ned, taking the bottle, and repeating the process. “That’s pretty nasty man.”

Peter Grabbed the bottle back, only to take another swig of the beverage and gag just the same. He held it on his tongue until tears began to fall. He swallowed it painfully and began to cough. “I can do this,” he told himself, “I can be like him.” He took a larger sip.

It burned the whole way down, threatening to dissolve his stomach. At least that's what it felt like. He pressed on nonetheless. To his surprise, it got easier the more he drank; making him drink more. One bottle turned to two and then three, just getting a taste of as many types of alcohol as he could in one sitting. Wines, rum, whiskey, whatever he could find. Quickly; a lot quicker than he would have liked, he found himself far beyond wasted, lying in a puddle of spilt booze.

Ned was watching uncomfortably from the sidelines, hoping Peter would stop soon, but he didn’t. He could see the way his friend changed with each drink. “Peter, I think you should stop,” he pleaded many times.

“Wha’ no, no, no. I’m- it’s fine. All good,” came Peter’s slurred reply.

“Yeah, no you’re not.”

Peter and Ned made awkward prolonged eye contact. Peter moved to speak, opening and closing his mouth many times before he finally managed to form the words he was looking for, “Ned, I-I really want to do somethin’ fun. Somethin’ cool. Let’s go train.” His voice lacked the excitement his face portrayed.

“Hey, uh, J-JARVIS?” Ned worriedly spoke to the godly voice, “is there a way you can keep him from doing that?”

Peter stumbled to his feet, not registering or responding to a single word Ned spoke. “Affirmative,” JARVIS’s voice called. Peter still did not react verbally. Physically he was attempting to make it to the door without losing balance. Ned approached his intoxicated friend to hold him back but Peters reflexes; even when not of sound mind, were far too fast and strong to be held back so easily.

Peter dashed out of the room with a goal in mind leaving Ned alone again. Ned couldn't catch up to a hero on the run. Especially one who could climb walls and crawl faster than he could run normally. Time was moving too fast and out of control. Peter was in his Spiderman suit in the blink of an eye, out the front door even faster, and lost in the city before Ned could get his cell phone out of his pocket.

It took four tries to reach MJ, “yo, Ned. Can I help you? I’m trying to read.”

“Peter’s drunk and running loose in the city as- dressed as Spiderman. He- um- he stole a suit from Avengers Tower!” Ned panicked.

“You mean his suit?” she asked calmly.

“You- you know?”

“I didn’t know for sure until you just told me. I had a theory.” Ned mentally scolded himself. “But the drunk part is way more concerning. I take it you need my help? I’ll meet you at the deli. If Peter isn’t there… we’ll see.”

Ned had no time to respond before she hung up. The dial tone rang out, being the only noise in the room. "Oh no," Ned spoke to no one, "how do I get out there."

"A car has been brought out for you," said JARVIS.

“But I-”

“It is controlled by an A.I. You will not be driving.”

“Cool,” Ned couldn’t help but be impressed. When he rolled up to the tiny deli in Queens, sitting in one of Tony Stark's car, he felt amazing. MJ was already waiting for him with no sign of Peter in sight but he was riding high. “Hey MJ!” he called, rolling down the window, “I’m in Tony Stark’s self-driving car! Let’s go get Spiderman!”

As she jumped in the car, it was no surprise that his words caused a commotion. “Way to keep things under wraps, idiot.” 

"Oh, oh right," he said, yelling at the people on the street, "we're looking for Spiderman. Nothing to see here!" He rolled up the tinted windows so no one could see inside. He then raised a thumb in satisfaction.

“Great job big guy.”

The car sped off down the streets seeming to know where to go. Though Ned was in the backseat he could see the dashboard of the car had a monitor, tracking a blinking dot, “tracker. Cool.”

MJ rolled her eyes, “anyway what happened?” Ned explained as calmly as he could, anxiety spiking when Tony Stark came up in conversation. “Okay, okay. It’s fine. We’ll bring Peter back, sober him up with a shit ton of coffee, bribe his A.I so it doesn’t tell Mr Stark, and then clean up the evidence.”

Ned nodded. The car stopped at the entrance of an alleyway that Peter was clearly in. Spiderwebs were spun all around the alley in an unusual yet precise manner. It almost looked like a nest. Thankfully, the streets were empty and secluded. The two teens hopped out of the car, fearfully moving towards the den. “Gross. I don’t want to go in there.”

“Buck up,” MJ said, walking through the webs. Peter was swinging through the openings he created, crying out in happiness. “PETER!” MJ cried, catching the young spiders attention. 

He fell flat when trying to catch a stray web to get to her. Looking up at her with his mask blocking his facial expression from being legible, he yelled, “MJ! It’s like… so good to see you. I missed you.”

MJ seemed shocked for a moment before reaching out to help him up. “Listen to me very carefully, Peter. We’re gonna get you out of here.” She tried to pull him to his feet but his legs didn’t want to work. He was dead weight, “Peter, can you walk?” He shook his head, suddenly less active and alert. “Ned get over here and help me.”

Between the two of them it was easier to move the boy, but getting him into the car was a pain. After some shouting and dropping Peter once, they managed to prop him up on the seat. They closed the door and Ned set the coordinates back to the tower. MJ pulled Peters mask back only to flinch, “oh god, he’s bleeding.” Peter’s nose was dripping crimson, smeared over his cheeks and the inside of his mask. 

A female's voice echoed from inside the mask, "he has a slight fracture on his nose from when he fell. It is not serious and can be treated at home as everything is still aligned and not fully disconnected. Keep his head elevated and apply cold to the area as soon as possible. Do not allow him to blow his nose and seek medical attention if he loses consciousness, bleeding does not stop soon, or if he develops trouble breathing."

"Remind me to thank Tony Stark for his A.I's if I ever meet him," MJ joked, pulling Peters head onto her lap as she laid him flat on the seat. She wiped away the blood with the sleeve of her sweater. The red seeped through the navy blue fabric quickly but did its job effectively.

MJ caught Peters eyes as they glistened with tears. She wiped them away with her adjacent sleeve. “You alright, nimrod?”

He smiled from ear to ear, "you look so pretty. Y-You do something, um, something new with your hair?"

She shook her head playfully. “Nope, but worrying about a stupid friend doing a stupid thing sure does something to you. You’re going to make me go grey if I’m not careful. No wonder Mr Starks so stressed all the time.”

Peter began to get worried, raising his hand to her mouth, “shhh. He can’t hear what happened.” He yawned knocking more tears out of his eyes which she wiped away again. “N-no telling Tony. He’d be really mad at me.”

MJ looked at Ned who was at a loss for words. “Fine Peter,” she sighed, “no telling Mr Stark.” When they reached their destination they had to repeat the process of carrying Peter, this time to his room. Silently thanking anyone and anything for the elevator already waiting for them. The movement seemed to unsettle something inside Peter and he began to vomit in the elevator. “You’re cleaning that up, called it!” 

“This sleepover sucks.”

They took him to his room and set him up with a waste bucket, some ice wrapped in a bag and towel, and some tissues for the blood which seemed to be stopping. His head was propped up on some pillows to keep it elevated; he leaned into them, enjoying the soft support. MJ pulled the blanket up over him and sat at his side. “I’ll stay with him for a while. Can you go brew some coffee and clean up?”

“Yeah, I’ll try. But I’ll probably get lost.” Ned left the room quickly, making it halfway down the hallway before coming back. “Thanks by the way.”

 

The next time Peter woke up he had a splitting headache. He was in his room, however; he had no recollection of what had happened the night before. He leaned over the side of the bed with barely enough time to make it to the waste bin before vomiting. He groaned in pain, toppling down into the pile of pillows.

“Oh,” a voice behind him rang, “look who’s awake.” It was, of course, Tony Stark himself. Peter had no energy to lift his head, but his eyes shot open. Tony was leaning on the doorframe, staring at Peter.

“‘M sorry,” Peter mumbled.

"You damn well better be. Let's go over it, shall we? You stole and drank my alcohol, you drank while underage, left the premises despite my clear instruction not to, left while dressed as Spiderman and caused a huge mess, need I go on?"

Peter raised his hands to his head, squeezing tightly, “no. Please god no. It hurts Tony.”

Tony’s voice softened, “I know it does, kid.” He walked over to the struggling child, crouching down to face level. “I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed. You caused a real mess you know. Worse, you got hurt. You know I don’t want to see you in pain. Stay in bed and drink lots of water.” He handed him a bottle which Peter downed quickly. “I’ll get you some cereal and toast. Maybe some ginger tea to soothe the stomach.” 

At the mention of food, Peter was thrown into another wave of vomiting. Tony lightly patted him on the back, soothing him softly. “Rest. I’ll be back soon.” 

“Thanks.”

“Any time kiddo.” He left the room, closing the door softly behind him and made his way to the kitchen. “Oh, May. What your nephew is doing to me.” He said to himself. When he entered the kitchen there were the two other teenagers, seated, waiting for Tony to return, presumably to yell at them. He poured himself a cup of coffee and smiled. “You can breathe again. I’m not mad at either of you.” They sighed happily, at which he chuckled, “you did really well dealing with him. I know what it’s like to be a teenager. Stupid as all hell.” They nodded. “I’ll get us all some breakfast and if he’s up for it later, you can stay over tonight and finish this sleepover.”

MJ raised her hand, “um, what about me?”

“Are you kidding me? You’re going to become a regular babysitter for him. He listens to you. And Natasha apparently. I’m leaving you in charge miss..?”

She smiled, shaking his hand, “call me MJ.”

“Alright MJ, Ned. How’s pancakes sound?”

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on Tumblr here! [https://www.tumblr.com/blog/spidersonandfriendsfics](url)


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